i am baby deer where is mama?

There is a gray cat, with one lazy eye and both covered in cataracts, on the dining room table. It is not my cat, or my dining room, or my table: I have been married now for just over one month, and we are housesitting in Charleston.

Grace objects – "please, get him down. I can't do work." I am unsure if it is a he or not, but I am inclined to say no. Regardless, is now the time to argue with my wife? The dogs are both male, but all dogs seem to be: they have a gaze about them, they carry themselves in a certain fashion, I have had four dogs growing up – all males. For better or rarely for worse, a dog can safely be assumed to be a he. But a cat? This cat? Perhaps I should just take a peek.

But I won't, because Google Search now uses AI, and I have spent years refining my searches, to maximize keywords and lessen my humanity. Unfortunately, times have changed. Instead of, "how do I fix the engine mount on my 2010 Toyota Tundra," I made a habit of writing my search to maximize keyword matches, "2010 Toyota tundra engine mount replacement." And what returned was a man with a YouTube channel, likely in San Diego, or Phoenix, or some other suburban desert, with a truck in worse condition than mine yet evidently more loved.

But things are no longer that simple: yesterday, during a short period of scrolling – which I, as with many moments involving algorithms AND/OR screens such as, deeply regret – I watched someone google, "i am baby deer where is mama?" The search result stuck with me: